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Self-Feeling Emerges as the Core Focus in New Parenting Guidance

Psychologist Jette Blaschke warns that everyday phrasing can erode a child's inner safety.

Overview

  • New reports lay out four unconscious pitfalls for parents: overprotective “be careful” warnings, evaluative praise, time pressure that blocks reflection, and parents’ own low self-feeling.
  • Blaschke defines self-feeling as a child’s lived sense of being okay and capable, describing it as the precursor necessary for healthy self-worth.
  • Recommendations emphasize co-regulation and naming emotions, along with giving children chances to practice self-soothing and experience self-efficacy instead of relying on punishment.
  • Practical steps highlighted include brief periods of undivided attention, allowing boredom and limiting toys to boost creativity, simple daily rituals, and prioritizing autonomy over perfection.
  • Blaschke reports that over 80% of parents she works with rate their own self-feeling as weak, while noting it can be developed throughout life.